If your partner has ever broken up with you or cheated on you after months or years of being with each other, the sting of that betrayal can be very painful. The same sting can come from abusive parents who are supposed to show you love and care. You thought this person would care for your well-being and always be there for you. But instead, they violated your trust and made it hard for you to trust others.
The emotional scars that you are carrying from relationship trauma can be hard to heal from. If you have been betrayed once, you are also expecting future betrayals. You may run away from relationships with people who care about you for fear of getting hurt again. But it is important to know that you can heal no matter how long it takes. That not everyone in the world is bad for you.
Here is how you can find healing from relationship trauma.
Acceptance
Healing from relationship trauma means you need to come to terms with what happened. Not addressing it will cause you to spend all of your time replaying these memories that you cannot focus on anything else.
While it may be painful to acknowledge your pain, holding it in will not make you feel better. Try to write in a journal first about what you are feeling. This way, you can discover what went wrong and have a better idea of what to look for in a new person.
Reach Out to Others
It can be challenging to open up to people if you do not trust them. You could fear receiving judgment from them, or they will not take it seriously. Think about someone you know the most and who has never let you down before. Let this person know you are either just looking for someone to listen to you or would like guidance. Even if this person has not been through the same things as you, they could still be a source of comfort and a distraction away from persistent thoughts.
Discover Your Needs
If your partner cheated on you or if your abusive parent decides they want to see you after so many years, you may not know what to do. The love you have for that person is still there, but you want to be sure you are making the right decision. You do not need to have the answers right now. Find a book to read to keep you distracted from your thoughts, or go for a nice walk. Give yourself some breathing room by keeping yourself hydrated and eating healthy food. You can also find a movie or TV show that will provide you comfort during this emotional time. Whatever you do, always put your needs first above anyone else’s.
Give Therapy a Chance
While healing during this terrible time of tackling relationship trauma is important, you never have to do it alone. Speaking to a therapist can help you work through your betrayal before it causes you distress. Therapists who have worked with survivors of abuse have the training they need to help you with the long-time effects of betrayal. Maybe your therapist can recommend family or couple’s counseling to help work through any underlying issues. You will learn not to blame yourself anymore, build your self-esteem, and learn how to cope with difficult emotions.
If you are looking for a therapist, don’t hesitate to get in touch with us for a free consultation. We are always here to help.
Click here to find out more about trauma therapy in Colorado. Serving Boulder, Longmont, Denver.
For your other needs, you can count on April Lyons Psychotherapy Group, to help you heal and grow through EMDR therapy, somatic therapy, trauma therapy, and PTSD treatment – because we believe in your strength and potential for recovery.
